Social Media and Screen Addiction in Teens: When to Be Concerned

What is "too much" screen time for my teenager?

For most teens today, phones aren't just gadgets, they're places for friendships to happen, homework to get done, places to escape boredom and spaces for identities to be quietly practiced. When we ask ourselves, "is my child spending too much time on their phone?" We often don't receive a straightforward "yes" or "no". Phones are a regular part of many teens' lives. More importantly, our real question should be: is this amount of screen time allowing my teenager to perform as well as they did previously (function) and feeling better about themselves than they were before (well-being)? Or is the screen time getting in the way of their ability to do so?

This article will give you some calm ways to evaluate the amount of screen time your teenager is having each day and know when it might be wise to contact someone for additional support.

Why teenage brains are especially drawn in

Teenage years are one of the times during which children develop physically and cognitively faster than at any other stage in childhood. The sections of the adolescent brain that are involved in receiving rewards, seeking social approval and experiencing novel things develop much quicker than the areas of the brain responsible for controlling impulses and making judgments based on experience. The majority of popular social media platforms have been developed around these reward pathways; therefore, they provide immediate gratification through such methods as likes, notification alerts, streaks and seemingly endless scrolling. As a result, it could be extremely difficult for an adolescent whose brain has been formed to be highly sensitive to peer approval to turn away from them.

It doesn’t necessarily mean that every teenager that enjoys their phone is “addicted”, rather, their attraction to their phone is due to normal biological responses to incredibly effective design  and perhaps they require additional support than adults would to maintain the appropriate balance.

Normal use versus something more concerning

Most adolescents spend excessive amounts of time looking at screens because of either necessity or enjoyment. However, there is a difference between excessive screen time that is considered abnormal behaviour and excessive screen time that is simply excessive behaviour. In order to consider the amount of screen time that you are worried about excessive is by evaluating its influence on your teen's daily routine. Most excessive screen time occurs while an adolescent is awake, and therefore it is common for screen time to overlap with their daily routines including sleeping, going to school, interacting with friends, eating meals, engaging in hobbies etc. Excessive screen time that begins to interfere with any of these routines represents a form of excessive screen time that warrants concern. Ask yourself if your teen's phone is becoming a central component of their lifestyle or if their lifestyle is beginning to revolve more and more around their phone.

Signs it may be time to be concerned

A single indicator of potential problems related to excessive screen time does not constitute a medical condition. However, if you notice a combination of the following indicators, especially if you believe they indicate a significant change from your child's previous behaviour then it may be a good idea to take them seriously:

• Sleep is suffering. Staying up late scrolling, difficulty waking, or tiredness that affects the whole day.

• School or focus has slipped. Falling grades, unfinished work, or an inability to concentrate without checking the phone.

• Withdrawal from offline life. Losing interest in friends, family, sport or hobbies they once enjoyed.

• Strong distress when disconnected. Irritability, anxiety or anger when the phone is taken away or the internet is off - beyond ordinary annoyance.

• Loss of control over use. Repeatedly trying to cut down and being unable to, or using far more than intended.

• Secrecy or dishonesty about how much, or what, they are doing online.

• Mood changes linked to screens. Feeling worse after being online, comparing themselves harshly to others, or reacting intensely to online events.

• Physical signs. Ongoing headaches, eye strain, skipped meals, or neglected self-care.

The pattern that matters most is interference and change: use that is displacing sleep, learning, relationships and wellbeing, and a young person who seems more anxious, low or isolated than before.

What often sits underneath

Heavy Screen use frequently is more than just a cause of problems. Heavy Screen use is typically more of a symptom than a cause. Anxious teenagers who are lonely, bullied, low in mood, or feeling pressured with exams will sometimes go to their phones because screens provide relief from their problems. When you simply confiscate their devices, most of the time nothing really gets solved and this takes away one of the many ways they have to cope with their feelings. It is usually more productive to try to understand why a young person uses their phone rather than focusing solely on the fact that they used their phone.

What parents can do

Parents have much greater influence over their children than they think. Parental warmth works much better than surveillance.

Focus on connection rather than confrontation. Be curious about what your teenager enjoys doing online & how it makes them feel. Teenagers open up to you when they do not feel judged.

Set boundaries together with your teenager instead of imposing them by decree. Examples include phones out of bedrooms at night, screen-free meals, or wind down hours before bedtime. The rules set by a teenager are going to mean much more than those that were simply given to them.

Provide for the basic needs such as sleep, physical activity, spending time with friends, and downtime without any structure.

Healthy baseline levels tend to naturally limit amounts of screen use.

Model healthy behaviour yourself. Teenagers pay attention to when all members of the household follow the same rules.

Let them know that no matter what happens online (even if something has happened online that was very troubling or frightening) they can come to you & tell you without fear of punishment.

When to seek professional support

You may want to consider contacting a mental health provider if:

Teenage behaviours listed above continue despite your best efforts to manage things at home.

Teenage Screen use is seriously disruptive to schoolwork, social relationships, or sleep.

You notice ongoing low mood, anxiety, withdrawal from family/friends/other activities, or changes in eating habits.

Your child mentions self-harm, hopelessness, or experiences online which have severely distressed them.

In general, if a teen ever expresses thoughts of hurting themselves, treat this as urgent and get help right away, do not wait.

A psychiatrist or therapist will help determine whether what you're seeing in your teenager's behaviour is normal teenage behaviour due to stress or depression, or patterns of Screen use that are actually problematic; and both the young person and the family will receive support developing plans that fit each individual.

The goal is never to take away a teenager's world but to assist them in building a healthier relationship between their self and their world.

A closing thought

Being worried about a teenager's screen time isn't being overly reactive; it's caring. Many times, a few honest conversations along with some shared boundaries make a real difference. And when it feels like more than that, no parent has to figure it out alone.